Broken

Sad news...Jason and I broke up.

We've been having some really hard times these past few months and it's taken a lot for us to keep going and this weekend...it's just over.

This has been the absolute hardest 2 days of my life. I don't know what to do, say, think, anything - I'm just not sure how to cope. I've actually called him twice to talk about just feeling stuck, but I know I can't do that anymore - we just need to give each other time to think about things.

It's actually kind of an abnormal breakup - we're not really sure right now if it's a break or a breakup, but we both agree that whatever it is, it's not going to be fixed any time in the next week or few weeks so ...time will tell. Also, we talked a lot yesterday (in person) just about what to do, where to go - everything. He talked about how he had already paid for what we were supposed to do on Valentines Day and we came to the conclusion we deserve a Valentine's consolation prize - so we're still gonna go. It's a little strange, but I think we need the next four days to be apart and then know we'll be able to see each other. We determined that we won't get back together on Thursday - we need more time than that, but I think it will make a world of difference for me to see him.

This has been so incredibly hard. I've cried more in the past 24 hours than I ever thought possible and I sincerely hope there will be a happy ending to all of this. It's just ridiculously hard. And I owe it to myself to figure out what will be best for me (no matter how easy it is to think HE'S what's best.)

So anyway. That's what has been going on. Sad. :(